Thursday, July 14, 2005

“Someone Else’s Place”

“Have you ever left a thought unsaid? Have you ever left a word unspoken?”

I’m worried. Maybe I’m just being silly. Maybe it’s just one of those phases. I keep telling myself that she’ll outgrow it. But it’s hard for me to convince myself. Been there, done that. I saw what the Young Scientist went through with his delayed maturation and social skills. I wouldn’t wish it on anybody. Directly or indirectly. Kid or parent.

The Young Scientist was lucky, in the long run. He grew out of his problems. One friend’s daughter and another friend’s son weren’t so lucky—they grew into theirs. I think the young man will be alright. But the young woman . . .

This little pre-schooler scares me. She’s—I guess the word is obsessive. Or compulsive. Or both. And she has such a constant craving for attention. “High maintenance,” her father calls her. She’s even worse than the Young Scientist was at that age.

But what am I supposed to say? You would think that, being older and having raised a kid with delayed development, I would know a thing or two. But I have only one kid. So who has more experience, here? If I say anything, will they find it condescending? Or, worse yet, insulting?

I wish there were a good way to say something. Just to wish them chazak (strength), and tell them that I hope all goes well in the long run. Just to tell them to keep laughing, because sometimes that’s the only thing that saves one’s sanity as a parent.

So I’m adding them to my “Sh’ma Kolenu (Hear our voices)” prayer list.

That’s what I usually use when I want to wish someone chazak.

And here’s a prayer, right here and now (why wait?):

Yihi ratzon milfanecha, Hashem Elokeinu v’Elokei avoteinu v’imoteinu, May it be Your will, our G-d and G-d of our Fathers and Mothers, that she grow to be a healthy, happy, and, as the frum (Orthodox) say, “G-d willing”—or perhaps “b’ezrat Hashem (with G-d’s help)” works better here—a normal person. That she be spared. That she be blessed with the ability to learn Torah u’madah (Jewish and secular knowledge), Torah im derech eretz (the Law and the proper way to treat others). That she grow up to a life of Torah u-maasim tovim (Jewish observance and good deeds). And, if that’s what she wants, chuppah (the marriage canopy), too. Yihi ratzon milfanecha l’varech et ha-yaldah ha-zot, May it be Your will to bless this girl, Yonina bat Channe u’Moshe.

What a coincidence. I’ve just finished writing this prayer, and here I am, with the radio blog on, suddenly finding myself listening to “Haazina.” “Give ear, G-d, to my prayer, and do not hide Yourself from my supplication. “ Please.


Blogger PsychoToddler said...

Beautiful prayer. Thank you. I'm not too worried. I may exaggerate at times for comic effect. But she's a brilliant kid with a strong personality.

Who just happens to want to rule the world.

What toddler doesn't?

Fri Jul 15, 09:59:00 AM 2005  
Blogger Shira Salamone said...

I'm glad that you're not too worried. Truth to tell, "relieved" would be a more accurate description.

As to the rest, what can I say? :) Yonina for President! :)

Fri Jul 15, 11:15:00 AM 2005  
Blogger PsychoToddler said...

She did exceptionally well on our trip to NY. I'm very proud of her.

Upon her return, however...

Fri Jul 15, 08:16:00 PM 2005  
Blogger Shira Salamone said...

Oh, well--at least it was nice while it lasted. :)

Sat Jul 16, 10:23:00 PM 2005  

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